I have not really blogged much recently....for a reason. A BIG reason.
I have been doing some BIG work on myself and with myself. I didn't really set out for all this reading and listening and thinking and praying. This perfect storm has sort of settled in and the universe is tossing wisdom and shift at me from all directions. And it is welcome, pleasurable, peaceful and clear.
I am reluctant to even press the letters on this keyboard because I could bleed all over this blog post...but I am not sure I am ready to share...or am afraid to over-share, maybe? My thoughts are pretty much a jumbled mess right now so trying to get anything coherent on the page might be an exercise in futility anyhow.
However, I do want to share a bit of what the universe has gifted me, recently.
Flee these things and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, patience and gentleness.
....intuition is really a sudden immersion of the soul into the universal current of life, where histories of all people are connected, and we are able to know everything, because it is all written there.
To be nobody-but-yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody but yourself-means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight-and never stop fighting.
Last, but certainly not least, I have had some PROFOUND conversations with the women in my life. The conversations have been real, soulful, deep and honest. I have been allowed the opportunity to listen to what they see from the outside looking in and the wisdom they have shared will carry me, forever, I assume. You all know who you are...I honor the divine in you!
I am ultimately shooting for "wholehearted living" which is scary, scary, scary...but the gifts of imperfection, as allowed by Brene' Brown, are COURAGE, CONNECTION AND COMPASSION. And THAT is the life I WANT to live!
At this moment I am loving "this moment!" Sure, I am home on a Saturday night. But I am not regretting it one bit. I am laying on my bed...this will be our last night together as my new, fluffy, tall (most importantly) delicious, marshmallow bed will be arriving between 5 and 8 pm tomorrow! (Shout out to Jonas at Mattress Firm-Huebner Oaks location.) A tangent...imagine that. Anyhow, I am laying on my bed, windows open, first cool front of the season sweeping in and around me. Mary is at my side with her brand new fall sweater keeping her snuggly and warm. In the distance I am listening to Texas play West Virginia. It MOST definitely feels, and sounds, like fall.
Every year, around this time, I start running VERY low on my signature fragrance Quelques Fleurs by Huobigant. The timing is perfect, really, as I enjoy wearing The Body Shop's White Musk during cooler weather. It is too heavy to carry off in Texas summers. But, here again, every year, around this time I have yet to restock that, as well. As a result I am forced to start digging into my stash of samples for reinforcement. Last week I grabbed a sample of Brown Sugar and fell into olfactory love! It is warm like a pie in autumn and it feels just perfect for this time of year. Added bonus: it is very well priced. I ordered it online because I ADORE packages in the mail; however I know it can be purchased at Neiman Marcus.
Every once in a while I receive an email from Hispano Bloggers offering me an opportunity to share with my readers a project or a product they are promoting. Right now they have asked me to consider a book. Never one to pass up an offer to read a book, I am more than willing to dive into a book and pass along my thoughts to my Fete-ish-istas!
While I have not received a copy of The River by Michael Neale, yet, I am excited to share the book trailer with you all.
"The river will inspire readers to live the life for which they were created." -John C. Maxwell, founder of EQUIP and The John Maxwell Company.
Gabriel Clarke felt mysteriously drawn to the river, a line of white water and foam, making their way through rugged canyons in the heights of the Colorado Rockies. That passion for the river, from the depths of his being, was undeniable. Its mighty waters called him to feel the freedom and the adventure.
But something held him - the memory of a shocking event he witnessed in the river when he was just five years - something no child should see.
The chains of fear and resentment kept him away from the treasures you might discover in the river. He could not leave his past behind, still trapped, afraid of life than expected.
In this captivating story, Gabriel learns to shed the past means surrender to The River - soul, heart, body and mind.
A Rafflecopter giveaway disclosure: This giveaway is sponsored by participating blogs. Fete is not responsible for the winners prize. For questions or comments on this giveaway please contact
Monday evening I asked Jace' to join me for an exercise in restraint. I wanted to challenge myself to a stroll through a book store WITHOUT purchasing a book. Over the weekend I moved furniture around opening up my grandfather's old bookshelf to house my books. I thought I could find a nice space for each one of my treasured children. NOT EVEN CLOSE! I realized...it's just a disease...my book buying (and refusal to lend, re-sell, give away, etc.) disease.
Ever the friend to set me straight, Jace' met me at Barnes and Noble. I grabbed an Iced Tea and we wondered upstairs where the REAL challenge was on....FICTION AND NEW RELEASES! John Irving has a new book out. So does Chuck Palanhiuk...so do a lot of people. What I needed was a diversion and FAST. (Lest Jace' have to knock me out...as I ordered her to do.)
And there he was....Dimitri James....IN PERSON! My temporary savior was introducing himself to a group of women (and a few men). Jace' and I grabbed two seats and were handed two tickets by his publicist Kelly. (Now...it must be noted...Dimitri looks EXACTLY like Chris Klien and Kelly bears a striking resemblance to Cameron Diaz. I was confused for a moment!)
As I listened with rapt attention (mostly to get my mind off the new Chris Cleave novel) I found myself laughing out loud, nodding my head in agreement, cringing in conviction as Dimitri shared his inspiration for his second publication.
Apparently Dimitri's friend, Jill, is the consummate nice girl who gets overlooked for everything! (Ever felt like Jill?)
She often calls him for advice and he has told her (time and again) to kick the double strand pearls and Tory Burch flats in favor of a tailored pencil skirt or a one shouldered dress with classic platform heels. Apparently Jill is still a work in progress...but the message was clear...and it resonated with me! What was the message? The message is a mantra:
"Sexiness does not belong to the beautiful, young, thin, adorable. Naughty knows no size. It doesn't matter what shape I am in, how old or how much time and money I have to spend on myself. I can still be sexy, fun, flirtatious and pulled together with clothes and make up customized to accentuate my positives and distract from my negatives." -Naughty Makeovers for Nice Girls
And, so, the mantra became a book!
(At this point I was thinking, "Thank goodness I have make up on and fixed my hair today. Unfortunately these glitter Tom's aren't doing much for my 5"2' frame. I hope he doesn't notice.")
Dimitri hails from a long line of European-trained aestheticians, his mother and both grandmothers, showed Dimitri how to create soaps, toners and masks using pure and natural ingredients. He says his
"desire to make over anything that stood still long enough" manifested itself in 4th grade as he got in trouble for using colored chalk as eye shadow on his female classmates. The makeovers led to eye infections and subsequent phone calls from the nuns!
Dimitri enjoyed a career working for cosmetic giants including: Estee Lauder, Chanel, Revlon, Lancome and Borghese. Additionally he trained students at Adrien Arpel Salons and spas. Through his years in the industry he learned even more about the types of ingredients which go into cosmetic products.
He launched his own line of cosmetics in 2002. SKINN Cosmetics includes treatment, color and makeup products. Jace' and I were lucky enough to trade in our tickets for a GENEROUS portion of SKINN Cosmetics swag!
Stay tuned for my review of the products in the swag bag!
Did I walk out with a book? You BET I did! Like I said, it is a disease! I am now half way through my (signed) copy of Naughty Makeovers for Nice Girls and have to admit...despite the wealth of information my impeccable mother has shared with me over this lifetime...I have learned quite a few things! Thank you, Dimitri! You were absolutely delightful!
Coming soon: Naughty Makeovers for Nice Girls: Part Two-The Products
This one is rated "R"...little ears should not be in the room.
Source: Unknown
What belongs on a Post-It? The answers are endless, really. But NOT unlimited. Post-It notes are like the bottom feeders of the paper world. Their very size suggests they are meant for small lists, gentle reminders, a sweet note, a "note-to-self," etc, etc. They are easily stored. You can grab one with the wave of your one un-employed hand. You can scribble, be done, scrunch and toss without feeling much sense of loss. Now...I KNOW there are stories about entire corporations being birthed on a Post-It note and I won't deny that they come in very handy when a brilliant idea strikes. But, for the most part...a Post-It...is merely a Post-It and about as personal as my relationship to my mini-sewing kit and as long lasting as a fruit fly.
I can tell you what DOES NOT belong on a Post-It note: A BREAKUP!
Nor does a break up belong on a computer screen or a voicemail, in an email, via text, Facebook or Twitter. It does not belong over the phone (extreme circumstances notwithstanding). Hell, unless this is 17th century England, and your mate is thousands, okay, hundreds of miles away, a break up does not belong on paper...at all!
A breakup belongs in the space between two people. Period. The words need to be said, be heard and hang in the tense air. And the words need to be the truth.
I am no relationship expert. In fact, one might consider me more of a "Failed Relationship Expert." (What is it Thomas Edison said...."I haven't even failed once....I've just done things wrong 10,000 times.") And I am just as guilty as the next person. But I think our society has made one of the most difficult and painful conversations as arbitrary and perfunctory as taking your rubbish out to the curb. In fact, getting broken up with in said manner feels somewhat akin to being considered rubbish.
What I am is a human being and I try to abide by the golden rule. Do unto others as you would have done unto you. Again...I can think of two, VERY recent instances, where I found it so easy and safe to invoke the end of one casual and one much less casual relationship via email. I am as much to blame as the next person. The dust having settled, I am not proud of my behavior at all. As they said, it was "poor form." The thing is...in neither of those situations...did I receive push back. Both were opened, accepted, responded to and likely tossed in the proverbial "trash" by tapping the "delete" button.
Breakups are hard and painful. But in the end, you have been IN A RELATIONSHIP with another person...you have loved them, laughed with them, cried with them, grown with them, created memories with them, become family to them...the VERY LEAST both people deserve is a face-to-face conversation...which may in the end even create a solution to the impasse.
Source: Unknown
I realize people don't want to hurt others. Unless you are a sociopath, it is easier to throw out the break up and slink away playing both defense and offense at the same time. I also realize looking in someone's face, in someone's eyes makes creating the words nearly impossible. But having been on the receiving end so many times...I can say that I would rather be "hurt with the truth, than comforted with a lie." And silence leads to assumptions, erroneous ones at that, and in the end it all feels like a lie, anyhow. And then living in the "why's" is just a living hell. (Someone else's words...not mine.)
I love technology...obviously. I adore blogs and posts that promote hope, love, laughter, joy, etc. In that way I think technology has a positive global reach we could have never achieved otherwise! But it can also rip people apart...and rip you apart at the same time. The speed, the convenience, the anonymity...it's frightening. I fear we are losing our human interaction, sensitivity and compassion one key stroke at a time. I think we all need to take a giant leap back and consider how technology has changed our sensitivity at the cellular level. (And no, I don't mean cellular phone level!)
Jesus' final dictate, "To love one another as I have loved you" is often very difficult when jealousy, insecurity, pride, hurt and anger can be transmitted within seconds disappearing from our eyes, and by extension, from our hearts and minds. Do we even stop to consider the person on the other side of the screen, anymore?
This book is resting by my bedside chair (I have a chair rather than a bedside table). It is called The Four Agreements.
And while, admittedly, I have only read the first chapter...I think this is a terrific road map for difficult, painful conversations...like breakups. If executed as suggested by Ruiz, the truth is hanging in between two people. It has been given genuine thought and leaves little room for assumption. Sure...it will feel terribly personal...for a while...but that, too, shall pass.
Like my mom always says, "We are all just trying to get through life." Indeed, we are. So let's challenge ourselves by giving a bit more thought before we press the "send" button....because it can really be an "end" button to something quite beautiful. Once it is out there...it can never be taken back.
The truth trumps silence, common courtesy should dictate difficult conversations and paper covers rock.
And while I am 100% sure neither of those gentlemen dare read my blog....I do offer my sincerest (technological) apologies...but you both already know that.
God knows I need to laugh! And The Universe sent BACK Best Friends Forever last night...not once...but TWICE! Yes friends, now that I have empty weekends and way too much time to think, it was like He heard me, He heard my question..."Where in the heck did Best Friends Forever go? That was a great show catering to my EXACT demographic. What? Thirty-something BFF's don't bring in ratings unless they are dripping in diamonds, laden in hair extensions and hurling mean accusations at each other?"
(Full disclosure: That last statement is haughty and filled with hubris. Yes, I too have fallen victim to The Real Housewives Guilty Pleasure Syndrome. In my defense, it is only Orange County and New Jersey....)
BOOM! Friday night, two weeks, to the day, post-apocalyptic breakdown (okay...that might be a squeak of an over-embellishment) I was granted permission to laugh!
This fast paced exchange was delivered with such elegant female humor...they really believed this to be true...of course they did! That was the best part. I had not laughed this hard in weeks! I LOVE this show. Of course....the second episode was the season finale. Booooo! I sure hope this one gets considered to be picked up again.
Lennon: It was so good to see Ken. I felt like I was in my 20's again.
Jessica: Europe in the late 90's...that was just a magical time.
Lennon: And what it was for me, really, was that I first felt like a real woman.
Sadly, I closed the back cover last night. I read the last forty pages...one setting at a time. I did not want this magical journey to end. I didn't want to say good bye to the strong characters who kept a delicate circus alive.
It is a rare sentiment, indeed, for a book to grab me in such a manner. This book will live in my heart forever.
And a debut novel! Well done, Miss Morgenstern. I can not wait for your next endeavor of enchanting magic and mystery to touch paper....
I am a shameless lover of television. I can be found cuddling comfortably in my bed watching re-runs of Gilmore Girls, Cooking Channel and HGTV, book in hand, kitties and doggy sprawled all around me. I am a Pilates instructor and believe firmly in this unique method of movement. Without question, I feel most beautiful when I am teaching Pilates. I am an intermediate pole dancer and blooming, inquisitive arielist. A school psychologist by education and training, I am a frustrated artist, writer, and chef. I love old furniture, the shabbier the better and I love finding unique items to add to my varied and quirky collections sprinkled throughout my home. I very much enjoy MOST types of music and am ALWAYS open to recommendations. Jazz and classic country are, by far, my favorite! I have cried at every play, opera, ballet and musical I have ever seen performed live, I talk to myself all the time and I am constantly dancing around my house. I hope one day to own an aqua vintage car, a refurbished Airstream, a home by the water and a bungalow in the city. I am a beautifully imperfect work in progress and I am learning to say, "I am not sorry for what I want!"
