So, last week was Valentine's Day and I kept the Top Ten Love Songs happy and light...songs of hope and joy and sappy sweet notions of happiness and "forevers."
This week....NOT SO MUCH! Tonight you get my Top Ten Love Gone Wrong Songs. There are so many great heartbreaking, angst filled, tear jerking songs I might just have to break them up by genre!
An obvious place to start would be in the sobering sub-category of good ol' country music. Let's put a quarter in the jukebox and line up ten of my favorite sad, sad, sad songs.
(These are in no order and I have listed the artist, not necessarily the lyricist, because these particular voices speak to me.)
1) Let Him Fly by Patty Griffin-Sometimes you just have to let go. And your heart muscle actually contracts in pain and the hurt is palpable...right in your chest...and you can't breathe...but you are relieved from the exhaustion of trying and wondering. My favorite "song line" of ALL TIME comes from this song, "You must always know how long to stay and when to go." I actually referenced it in my last breakup. I want to tattoo that on my wrist. I want it written on my tombstone. Sometimes you just have to let someone fly. For your sake and theirs.
2) You Were Always on My Mind by Willie Nelson-So sorry Willie, you are a day late and a dollar short. With any sense she will listen to your song and politely tell you to "piss off." Yes, the "little things you should have said and done," but didn't, ruined the relationship. I am pretty sure your "one more chance" is one chance too many. (This one is personal. Someone once broke my heart in a terribly callous way and I sat, night after night, crying as played this on vinyl. What a valuable waste of my time.)
3) Angry All The Time by Bruce Robison-This song just makes me afraid to be married. "The reasons that I can't stay don't have a thing to do with being in love." It just hurts to hear. I feel the pain on his behalf...the certain sign of a song well written.
4) I Will Always Love You by Dolly Parton-Oh.My.God! Sometimes love just isn't enough, is it, Dolly. But what a woman you are...to still wish him "love."
5) Fool Hearted Memory by George Strait-Oh when that fiddle starts...! How many times have I felt like the fool on the stool...at the bar with nothing but a drink and a song? Funny thing how the memories are so sweet sometimes. It's a tricky thing...the memory...isn't it. Get off the stool, George. Life is too short. There are a kajillion lovely women who won't walk out the door.
6) Promenade by The Gourds-Y'ALL....HE'S AT HER WEDDING TO ANOTHER MAN! What? Right? How did he come about the invitation is my question! The lyrics are rich. "And now I think about you always, and to myself I say your name. The way we were when forever was just another day." "I traded your sweetness for my loneliness and your confidence for my own regret and your simple grace for this disarray that's my stock and trade while you promenade." And she's thinking...as she glides around with her new love, "That's right mother f*$&er...you SURE did!" Oh...and he laments, "But in the evening when the sun's down, there's a sadness on it's way, it's like a ghost that know my address and where I lay." Wow! True story...I happened to know the date and time of an ex-boyfriend's wedding and guess what popped on in my car at that exact moment...YEP! This one. I imagined being in the crowd watching him promenade. It was a pretty brutal life moment. The thing is...the moment passed!
7) Making Believe by Emmylou Harris-This one is new and it hurts. I recently acquired this song on vinyl and I put the needle in the groove over and over again. Another song about not accepting the truth. Ugh...I have to stop writing about this one. It hits too close to home. Oh...and the steel guitar and the wailing fiddle...the instruments are even crying.
8) Goodbye's All We've Got Left To Say by Steve Earle-This one is a little different. The tune is a bit more upbeat; with a tiny Tejano twist to it. When goodbye is all that is left maybe a "happy dance" is actually in order.
9) Not Forgotten You by Kelly Willis-"Time flies and you just know, time to think about letting go. Times I even forget to be blue." You know that brief period of time where you have stopped crying daily...but you still hurt? You can actually go out to meet your friends and not think about him for an hour or two until the silence of walking through your front door slaps you in the face? This song celebrates the healing time...after the bleeding has stopped...but the wound is healing. The time where you can't imagine moving forward but know glancing in the rear view mirror is incredibly dangerous.
10) Angel from Montgomery by John Prine (and equally by Bonnie Raitt)-My second and third favorite "song lines" of all time arrive thoughtfully in this song. First, "...make me a poster of an old rodeo." I want to be made into a poster of an old rodeo gal with fringy cuffs, rhinestone studded collars, a long pale yellow skirt, a dull grey felt hat and glimmering white boots. Second, "How the hell can a person go to work in the morning, come home in the evening and have nothing to say?" Sometimes staying will suffocate you. She has to go. "To believe in this living is just a hard way to go."
I have listened to each of these songs as I created this post. It is now time for a hot bath, a snuggle with my Mary and a prayer up to God for knowing what is best for me. If love weren't the most powerful force in the universe, there certainly would not be so many songs written about it, and even more songs written about when it ends.
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