Saturday, January 1, 2011

Metaphor or Irony...or Both?

And in one final act of defiance....2010 irritated me at the last possible moment!  2010 looked me square in the face and said, "Fudge you, Patricia!"  Oh I said on Facebook...."2010....good riddance to bad luggage!" (Gilmore-ism, of course!)  Literally....

In the words of my dear friend, Jace'...."What had happened wuzzzzzzzz.....".......I left my house at roughly 8.15pm.  As I backed my car out of the garage I noticed both my blue recyclable and brown waste bins were snuggled comfortably in their place of honor; just outside the garage.  I thought to myself, "Damn...I forgot to put the waste bin out today.  It is full!  I am going to have to wait one more week!  Oh well.  Nothing I can do about it now."  

Upon my return at roughly 10.45pm....aforementioned brown waste bin is GONE!  Yes...the city issued brown waste receptacle is mysteriously missing and my blue recyclable bin is slightly askance, sad and missing a few of it's contents.  

Now, it has NOT at all been lost on me that things have recently gone missing from one, if not both, of those receptacles.  For instance, I threw out a set of (circa early 1980's) plastic mini blinds that had squatted in the garage since I purchased this place 8 years ago.  They sat poised to be hauled off to the land fill (I can't possibly compost EVERYTHING) for a few days.  Then....they were mysteriously missing.  

I understand if there are people who NEED my STUFF.  They can have it.  I have no issue with them ransacking my waste bins for things that are of value to them.  Come talk to me, ASK ME, I will say, "Yes...undoubtedly."  And...knowing me I would probably invite them in for cookies and coffee and say, "Look around....anything else you need?"  

It is an entirely different story when you STEAL MY CITY ISSUED TRASH BIN!  Now...I am inconvenienced.  First of all, I have to call "the city" and request a new bin.  Who KNOWS how long that will take.  Second, what the hell am I suppose to do with the trash that collects in the "por mientras?"  (The mean time!)  Shall I beg my neighbors to allow me to borrow their bins?  How embarrassing!  I don't want to burden them with my garbage...which is mostly disgusting pet refuse because I try to compost/recycle most everything else.

If you NEED my STUFF...take it.  But call "the city" for your own trash bin!  There is only so much "giving" one person can do before they (Patricia Vela) just become pissed and resentful!  I realize this is the grander scheme of life who really cares about a trash bin.  That isn't the point.  It is NO LONGER the point.  The theme of 2011 is: love, laughter and adventure.  Oh....and NO MORE DOORMAT-ISH-NESS for one Patricia Vela.  I am going to use the voice I was given, open my mouth, and tell people (politely) just how I feel.  Of course...I can't exactly chastise my trash thieves....because I don't really know who they are.  But this...this is MY forum!

Here's the irony.....all that was in the bin was old cat litter and a piece of old luggage that my cats had vomited on!  As I said....2010....good riddance to bad luggage!  And really, "2010....fudge you!"  

Today starts a new day, a new year and a new pledge to "really living".....any seeds of ill will shall fall on barren ground.  Happy New Year dear friends!  Look for the new, improved, Patricia Vela 3.0 and remind her (gently) when she is falling back on her old ways.  "I'm (not necessarily) mad as hell and I'm not gonna take it (foolishness of others) anymore!"  
I gotta keep you on your toes.  When you think I'll zig, I'll zag and then when you think I am gonna zag...I DO zag just to mess you up for the next time I might zig. -Lorelai

A solution would have been birth control.  Too late, move on. -Jess

I don't need you to be "sorry!"  I need you to be "there!" -Lorelai

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