I have been remiss in maintaining the "daily celebration" portion of this blog. This is in essence an egregious violation considering the ENTIRE purpose of this blog was to identify celebrations on a daily basis. Please, don't get me wrong, celebrations occur daily in my life. And I am certain for every one celebration that I am actually aware of; about 100 more take place that unfortunately go unnoticed by me because I tend to get wrapped up in the "Patty-ness" of being "Patty."I am feeling terribly open and vulnerable today. My life is in a state of huge transition. Well, let me be more specific, my Christian life is in great transition today. I have been largely reluctant to introduce my faith into this blog; mostly because I know religion and spirituality are often heated points of contention and I never intended this blog to be anything more than a "happy place where fun meets gratitude." But it would be a gross betrayal to pretend an entire shift has not taken place in my life. The truth is that roughly 11 to 12 months ago God reached out to me, when He knew I needed Him most and introduced me to His son, Jesus Christ and graciously allowed the Holy Spirit entrance into my heart. While I have enjoyed an enormous amount of peace and happiness as a result; I have also been challenged with very difficult notions and questions. Ever the loving God; He has graciously "loan" me powerful people and studies to make sure I wasn't drowning in a sea of questions without throwing me a number of flotation devices! He is just kind of great like that!
Today has not been an easy day. It's hard to put into words; but I do want to share. Similar to any relationship; a relationships with Christ has periods of discomfort and transition. Today was a major "transitional" day for me. Essentially, letting go into God is an uncomfortable exercise in giving up a considerable amount of control. I have never, and probably will never, be any good at this. Relinquishing the notion that I am "in charge" of it "all" is probably the most difficult thing I will do....or at least has been the most difficult thing I have done thus far.
However, I have a dear, wise friend who keeps reminding me that knowing "the fake Patricia Vela" is far less satisfying than knowing "the real Patricia Vela." That is tough stuff....I mean can I REALLY be me.....scared, confused, blissfully flawed, beautifully quirky me? Will that not drive an individual directly in the opposite direction of where I stand? Today it occurred to me that is exactly how God loves us....for he created us; unique and loves our flaws and gave His Son up on the cross so that our quirky little unique flaws are all forgiven away. Today....that is what I celebrate!
I just finished Margaret Atwood's most recent book The Year of the Flood. In her typical dystopian Handmaid's Tale style this book is a fascinating and rather frightening look at where this world might be, or metaphorically already is, as a result of human living. I highly recommend this book. It is both challenging and lyrical. She pits gentle living against violent humanity. If you can get through the first few chapters without feeling confused....you will be hooked and the confusion will be cleared up very, very quickly!
Adam One, the kindly leader of the God’s Gardeners – a religion devoted to the melding of science, religion, and nature - has long predicted a disaster. Now it has occurred, obliterating most human life. Two women remain: Ren, a young dancer locked away in a high-end sex club, and Toby, a former God’s Gardener, who barricades herself inside a luxurious spa. Have others survived? Ren’s bio-artist friend Amanda? Zeb, her eco-fighter stepfather? Her onetime lover, Jimmy? Or the murderous Painballers? Not to mention the CorpSeCorps, the shadowy policing force of the ruling powers… As Adam One and his beleaguered followers regroup, Ren and Toby emerge into an altered world, where nothing – including the animal life – is predictable.
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