To Wise, Willful, Wonderful Women

Last night I had the pleasure of spending the evening with my friend Najla.  I call her a "friend" because we are not technically related.  "Un-technically" speaking she is my sister.  We are both only children and have been friends for 32 years...yes...32 years!  Her husband and step son were away so we had the evening to reconnect in the way that women often do....over back to back showings of Pretty in Pink and endless hours of conversation.  (There were some cherry sours thrown in there for good measure!)

We had some pretty honest and frank talk about where we both "are" now and where we both "have been."  We talked about how we wouldn't trade in any of our mistakes, sorrows, doubts, heart aches, our "twenties" for anything in the world because they have made us the unique individuals we are today.  We discussed how it is often so easy to  "miss out" on the best parts of ourselves because we are so busy criticizing our most genuine efforts.  I think we both agreed that's why we have friends...to remind us!

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On my ride home I remembered something I heard on last week's episode of Mad Men.  "If you don't like what the people are saying, change the conversation."  I laughed because I thought "If I don't like what the 'voices' are saying, I should change the conversation."  And by the "voices" I don't mean Sybil...I just mean the internal voice.  I know I have the internal voice and while the voice can be sweet an gentle, it is mostly critical, nagging and mean.  Apparently the solution is "to change the conversation."

And as if by serendipity I heard this song on the radio.  I changed the pronouns as I was listening and thought about writing it down as a letter to myself.  Kind of like what the 35 year old Patty would tell the 20 year old Patty....

Dear Patty,

You took your love and you took it down.
You climbed a mountain and you turned around.
And you saw your reflection in the snow covered hill, 'til the landslide brought you down.

Oh mirror in the sky, what is love?
Can the child within your heart rise above?
Can you sail through the changing ocean tides?
Can you handle the seasons of your life?

You don't know.

Well,  you've been afraid of changing because you have built your life around you.
But time makes you bolder, children get older and you're getting older, too.

So take this love, take it down.
If you climb a mountain and you turn around.
If you see your reflection in the snow covered hills, well the landslide will bring it down.

Love always,
Patty